WLB Press

Dave Letterman's Impact on a Homesick New Yorker

In one week dis May, we said goodbye to Don Draper, B.B. King and Dave Letterman. While I'll miss all three, Letterman's void is the widest and the deepest as I've watched him for most of my life and most of his late night career.

Dave Letterman on NBC.

When it was Late Night with The World's Most Dangerous Band led by the incomparable Paul Schaffer, Letterman's antics were unpredictable, unusual and darn funny. I can recall being sick one summer and it seemed the only relief was Letterman and his "crash cam," a camera mounted on a skateboard that would crash into bottles and other visually impressive obstacles that would shatter and splash. Back then it seemed like Johnny Carson was Dave's opening act.

When I was at SUNY Buffalo, my roommates and I could barely afford rent much less cable or a decent TV. We'd have to shift the furniture around the living room to get reception and somehow, The Late Show always came through clearly. We'd gather like clockwork and no matter how broke we were, someone would scrape together a joint and we'd be glued to the set, critiquing his monologue, wondering whether or not his guests were really upset or if they enjoyed sparring with him. Who can forget Madonna's "nice rug" and his immediate retort "nice swim cap?" When I got back to NYC, I was determined to see him live and fill up on pizza and bagels.

I took my mom to my first show. I recall Nathan Lane was a guest and he killed it. I also recall getting a coffee from Hello Deli for the first time. The next show I had tickets to was on St. Patrick's Day in March of 1998 with Van Morrison and The Chieftans as the musical guest. The show was overbooked and I was turned away; however, the staff said I could come back to any other show as long as I let them know a day in advance. I picked his May 1, 1998 show, which was his 1,000th. Salma Hayek was supposed to be the first guest, but she cancelled at the last minute, leaving Norm MacDonald to cover two segments before Pearl Jam played Wishlist. I took my best friend to that one. We were seated in the balcony and while they discourage you from getting up, we both had to use the bathroom due to an aggressive happy hour beforehand. I remember running through the Ed Sullivan Theater and back to my seat just in time to see Pearl Jam take the stage.

In the year 2000, I worked across the street from Dave Letterman and would see Paul Schaffer on the street and Biff Henderson on his smoke break often. From high above, we could see where the guests arrived on 53rd street. I remember watching The Edge unload his guitar from a black SUV on October 29, 2001. Later, I would catch that performance on my rabbit-eared TV. For those who did not have cable then, CBS was the only channel you could get after September 11 as its antenna was on the Empire State Building.

Pumpkins blowing up on 53rd Street, Audioslave playing atop the marquee and the infamous Hello Deli Saga are memories I owe to Dave Letterman. Like a sailor out at sea, the iconic intro "From New York ..." was a beacon on the horizon welcoming you home, the image of the Tribeca Bridge, a bridge you once shoveled snow from despite its being covered, as familiar as the street you grew up on and Dave Letterman standing in the doorway, centerstage, smiling that smile, happy to see you ... and you, happy to see him each night.

Thanks for the memories, Dave!

Twitter Should Listen to Calvin Harris

Twitter's first quarter earnings report was a debacle. It was leaked early and the miss on expectations launched a fire sale similar to a Christmas tree lot on December 26. CEO Dick Costolo dove back under his desk, hiding from the angry mobs calling for his resignation.

From Silicon Valley to Wall Street to garages and basements around the world, it seems everyone is offering advice on what Twitter should do to regain its mojo, so I'll toss my marshmallow stick on the bonfire, too: Twitter should take a page from Calvin Harris.

Taylor Swift and Calvin Harris

In full-disclosure, I had no idea who Calvin Harris was until a colleague of mine returned from Las Vegas this week with photos and wild accusations that this DJ makes "$100 million" a year for pushing buttons! I was incredulous, but a quick search on Google turned up an article from Forbes that confirms Calvin Harris' earnings were $66 million last year ... for pushing buttons!

Turns out this DJ knows all the right buttons to push and my radio dial has found his music many times without my knowing it. Calvin Harris is able to manipulate emotions through his medium of electronic dance music much the way Walter-White-type chemists have done with MDMA. He certainly has his magical fingers in many honey pots and has recently been seen with Taylor Swift leaving fans of both musicians salivating in anticipation of their break-up song while fearful of an ill-advised collaboration similar to John Mayer and Katy Perry's Who You Love.

Dick Costolo, Jack Dorsey, Evan Williams and Biz Stone of Twitter

So what can Twitter learn from Calvin Harris?

It needs to reconnect on an emotional level with its users. The Twitter experience has yet to evolve to capture a sense of intimacy now that the party has grown in number, leaving its members wandering about with their hands by their sides. Calvin Harris knows what buttons to push to get those hands in the air. He adds new wrinkles and chronically innovates to build on what's familiar to his audience to lead them back to those heightened, intimate experiences that drew them in in the first place ... I feel so close to you right now, it's a force field / I wear my heart upon my sleeve like a big deal ... Twitter should listen to him.

Twitter's Periscope Is the Next Big Thing

This morning, I met a lovely couple in Dubai, played with a bunch of dogs in a park in Oregon and strolled through the gardens of Amsterdam all in the time it took to put on my slippers.

Periscope from Twitter

Earlier this week, I read the buzz on Twitter about its launch of Periscope, so when I saw it in the App Store as an editor's pick, I grabbed it.

Within a minute, I was off and running. The features are intuitive and easy, the quality is terrific, so I decided to broadcast the lively debate my children were having over what to eat for breakfast. Within seconds, 21 people joined the debate from around the world and I took a cue from one of them to ask my kids if they wanted bacon and a near riot of enthusiasm broke out.

A few days ago, a building exploded in downtown Manhattan due to a gas leak. Passersby caught a video of it that was later disseminated via the traditional news outlets. I think Periscope will bring about a paradigm shift in breaking news as eyewitnesses will now broadcast events from the palm of their hand. The ability to interact with these broadcasts will move people from the sidelines to the stage to see impromptu performances, interfere with an injustices or simply grab an item from a nearby yard sale they otherwise would not have attended.

Periscope will allow us to become our own newsroom producer, calling up screens that capture our attention. Traditional journalists will warn that anything can happen in a live broadcast and we're no stranger to the vulgar comments people post in social, but these realities won't detract the masses from Periscope's utility.

I suspect politicians and advertisers will show up on the platform soon, so I invite you to download Periscope now and see for yourself whether or not it's the next big thing.

Top Five Femme Fatales Named Kate

Number 5 - Kate Moss - Her attitude.

Kate Upton

Number 4 - Kate Mara - Her eyes.

Kate Mara

Number 3 - Kate Upton - Her ... well, you know.

Kate Upton

Number 2 - Kate Beckinsale - Her smile.

Kate Beckinsale

Number 1 - Kate Hudson - Her laugh.

Kate Hudson

Top Five Famous People From South Huntington, N.Y.

Number 5 - Darren Goldstein - Oscar, the guy you love to hate in The Affair.

Darren Goldstein

Number 4 - Tom Gugliotta - Michael Jordan once said Googs reminded him of a young Larry Bird.

Tom Gugliotta, Phoenix Suns

Number 3 - LP - Bad-ass rock-n-rolla.

Number 2 - Gerry Cooney - "The Great White Hope" fought for the Heavyweight Championship of the World in 1982.

Gerry Cooney vs. Larry Holmes, Las Vegas,1982

Number 1 - Walt Whitman - Everything in town is named after The Good Gray Poet, including this blog.

Walt Whitman

Top Five Hollywood Bombshells Named Olivia

Number 5 - Olivia d'Abo - Also known as Karen Arnold in The Wonder Years.

Olivia d'Abo

Number 4 - Olivia de Havilland - Also known as Melanie Hamilton in Gone with the Wind.

Olivia de Havilland

Number 3 - Olivia Newton-John - Also known as Sandy in Grease.

Olivia Newton-John

Number 2 - Olivia Munn - Also know as Sloane Sabbith in The Newsroom.

Olivia Munn

Number 1 - Olivia Wilde - Also known as Suzy Miller in Rush.

Olivia Wilde

Worry

I'm worried this won't come out right.

I worry that I eat too much and drink too much.
I worry that I'm not getting my money's worth.
I lie awake at night worrying about not getting enough sleep.
I worry that I'll say the wrong things or that I won't say anything at all.
I'm worried that people will see the real me and not like him.
I'm worried that I'm not as good as I think I am.
I'm worried about not enough time and not enough money.
I worry that I've made the wrong decision every time I get dressed.
I worry that my sons are going to turn out like me.
I worry that they will learn as I did, the hard way.
I worry that I haven't learned enough.
I worry about who may read this and who may not.
I worry that the joke is on me.
I worry about the outcome of football games even when I don't bet.
I worry that I've made the wrong decision at the checkout line.
I worry about home invasion and infestation.
I worry that I may lose control.
I worry that I that I was never in control.
I worry that I'm not as sophisticated as I need to be.
I'm worried that I'm not rugged enough.
I worry about getting old.
I worry about saying goodbye and saying hello.
I worry that people I know won't remember.
I worry that I won't remember.
I worry about paying the hard price for telling the truth.
I worry about being eaten by sharks.
I worry that I worry too much.
I worry that if I ran out of worry, I'd really be worried.

Winter's Coming

The hyperactive squirrels have been working overtime gathering their harvest for the winter and driving my retriever nuts as they always appear just out of reach.

On the road, there was a squirrel whose crossing ended midstream with a shattered acorn beyond its frozen grasp. Consumed with preparations for the future, the present blindsided it with swift, silent speed.

Halloween is a reminder of the grim worm-eaten world beneath our feet, rising up to cast its shadow in the overheard illumination we've constructed to ward off such creatures of the dark.

Winter's coming. Gather the game and the wood and the spirits and the furs and do your best to hide from those things that go bump in the night.

(Insert Vincent Price laugh here.)

Boo!

Liz Cho and Josh Elliott Are Engaged

Liz Cho and Josh Elliott are engaged according to Page Six and People. I guess some guys do in fact have all the luck. Weird Long Beard Press wishes them the best!

Liz Cho and Josh Elliott.

Awkward

Awkward is defined as lacking ease of grace in movement or expression. It can be a moment or an absolute as in chemistry. I'm no stranger to awkward.

Anna Kournikova

Exit the front door of my house and turn right with my dog comfortably ahead on his extended leash. He's on a mission, pulled by a scent I can not detect. I affix my bleary eyes and labored breath on this humid day to a vision of Anna Kournikova headed my way with an equally attractive Golden Retriever pup in tow.

We draw near, it's not Anna Kournikova, but a younger, taller version who seems nervous at the sight of me and my eager Labrador.

"He's friendly," I say.

Just then, my dog lunges at the beautiful pup who side steps and pounces on him in a fury of wagging tails and gaping, playful mouths. Their leashes bind together and suddenly I'm playing Twister with this long-legged woman in short shorts and tank top and there goes my flip flop and I'm all bedhead and morning breath, bloated from years of over indulgence when I nearly lose my balance and fall back like a sea crab exposed to the vulturous gulls circling above. This woman somersaults in mid-air while throwing one leash over the other and frees herself and her pup as she has freed her long, blond hair from frizz on this muggy day. I regain my composure with the grace of a Weeble wobble and fill the momentary silence with: "Beautiful ... I mean, she's beautiful ... the dog, um, what's her name?"

We continue on our circuitous route toward home when our paths cross again. This time the woman has her back turned to me, her dog held near and my head is down, firmly fixed on the ground, keep walking, boy, keep walking ...

Awkward.

Matt Foley, Motivational Speaker

Write What You Know

"All you have to do is write one true sentence. Write the truest sentence that you know." - Ernest Hemingway

Nature kills, human nature, too, I wish that wasn't true.

"This above all - to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man." - Shakespeare, Hamlet

There was a man who cut in front of me at a crowded rooftop bar overlooking the Chrysler Building which popped against the deep blue Manhattan sky on a pleasant summer night. I brought it to his attention and he shrugged his shoulders. I recalled the wisdom of Queen Elizabeth, who when asked what lesson was the most important to learn in life replied, good manners.

"I don't know much, but I know I love you." - Written by Barry Mann, Cynthia Weil and Tom Snow. Performed by Linda Ronstadt and Aaron Neville.

I was sitting beneath a tree having lunch on the campus of a large corporation when I called home. My mother and father, sister, nephew, wife and sons were 53.8 miles away from me and contemplating ordering Chinese food. I would have swum the Sound for an egg roll.

World Cup: A Fan's Note

I admit it, I only watch soccer every four years during the FIFA World Cup. While I do appreciate the sport, I don't have the bandwidth to keep up with it, but every four years, it's no trouble at all.

Crowd at Heartland Brewery in Midtown.

I have stood six deep at a bar near Plaza Meyor to watch Real Madrid play Barça and I've taken a long lunch to watch the Rangers play the Celtics in a dark hall where the comedian Billy Connolly was in attendance. It's hard not to get swept up in the atmosphere of these rivalries.

Now that the USA has emerged as a global contender, it is wonderful to see this country get on board with the rest of the world, which is to say that everything stops when the game is on. For example, I was in a crowded restaurant near Bryant Park this past week when a voice nearby said, "shouldn't you be in Connecticut?" I turned to see a friend I haven't seen in quite some time due to our busy work schedules.

I do understand the complaints of loyal soccer fans who feel encumbered by all of the new faces crowding around the set, asking which team is the USA and shouting orders at the barkeep, but I gently counter with a bet that they haven't watched a giant slalom since Sochi when a NBC reporter badgered Bode Miller to tears after he won the bronze.

Hooligans at a bar in Queens.

What if we could harness the enthusiasm and shared sense of purpose an event such as the World Cup produces and carry it through each day? There's certainly worse ways to spend an afternoon. What if we could all turn to each other with a knowing smirk at the dramatics of some players when pleading their cases to the refs? What if when we lose, we still win as was the case with USA vs. Germany thanks to our foe turned friend, Ronaldo?

I like to imagine what the world might look like then. Would we still see pictures of men lined up in front of a firing squad and satellite photos of recently moved earth where a mass grave was dug? Wouldn't it be better if the only evidence of violence we saw was pink teeth marks on a player's shoulder while he pleads to the ref?

I, for one, am glad there's a game to look forward to this Tuesday!

Dylan Penn Treats Us to a Smoke Show

That didn't take long. Dylan Penn has signed on to do her first movie, a horror film titled Condemned. In the meantime, she grabbed the lucky number seven cover of Treats! Magazine with a scorching portfolio by Tony Duran. Check it out:

Dylan Penn, Treats! Magazine, Issue 7.

I'm Out Like the Fat Kid in Dodgeball

People of Earth:

That was how Conan O'Brien began his statement to alert the world that he was leaving The Tonight Show, a statement he ran on PR Newswire, the company that has graciously employed me for the past 15 years. Today, April 30, 2014, concludes that run.

As I gave thought to how my statement should read, I reflected on all of the exit emails sent from colleagues through the years and there was one line that resonated: I'm out like the fat kid in dodgeball. I believe it was written in the summer of 2001 by a woman, Jen L., who was a natural born comedian. She could make us laugh in those stressful earnings periods, often at her own expense.

I spent the bulk of my time with PR Newswire at 810 Seventh Ave in Manhattan, located next door to the Ed Sullivan Theater, home of the Late Show With David Letterman. As Mr. Letterman has recently announced plans for his own retirement, I thought it would be appropriate to create a Top Ten List.

As I think back through the years, the colleagues I have worked with at PR Newswire have been some of the best people I've known. Chances are, if you're reading this, you're one of them. I began to think of the watering holes my colleagues and I would go to after the overnight shift at 8 a.m., or the Friday happy hour at 5 p.m., or when visiting another city. Believe me, it was hard to narrow them down to ten, but I managed. Here we go:

10. Checkmate Inn (East Setauket, N.Y.)
9. The Map Room (Cleveland)
8. Jimmy's Corner (New York)
7. The Dresden (Los Angeles)
6. Old Castle Pub (New York)
5. Houston Hall (New York)
4. The Iron Monkey (Jersey City, N.J.)
3. The Big Hunt (Washington)
2. The London NYC (New York)
1. Nice Guy Eddies (New York)

Nice Guy Eddies, NYC

-0-

Time

I often think of time, moving from one place to another, remembering my meals and appointments, cognizant of schedules and every now and then I pause to consider it. Today, I was in church and a couple renewed their vows in celebration of their golden wedding anniversary of 50 years. Tomorrow, I will meet with the legendary Harold Burson to discuss the year 1954 when PR Newswire was founded. Remarkably, he was one of its first customers. Through the years, I've come across many wonderful descriptions of time, here are three that stand out:

From The Tudors: Death of a Monarchy (Season 4; Episode 10) (2010):

King Henry VIII: [Opening lines] In these last days I've been thinking a great deal about loss. What loss, your grace, is to man most irrecoverable?
Charles Brandon: His virtue.
King Henry VIII: No, for by his actions, he may redeem his virtue.
Charles Brandon: Then, his honor.
King Henry VIII: No, for again he may find the means to recover it, even as a man recovers some fortune he has lost.
Charles Brandon: Then I can't say, Your Majesty.
King Henry VIII: Time, your grace. Of all losses, time is the most irrecuperable for it can never be redeemed.

King Henry VIII (right) and Charles Brandon from The Tudors

From "Killing Time," by Mumia Abu-Jamal, Forbes ASAP (November 30, 1998):

"Time is as elusive as a thief, silent as death. Only later does it appear, on the day you look into a burnished metal slab solidly riveted to a cell wall, and ask, 'Who is that old man?'

"For most prisoners, time is oppressive and liberating. At the beginning of a sentence, time stretches ahead, almost insurmountable in its height, almost unreachable in its distance. At the sentence's midpoint, time seems more navigable, for the time one has to do is measured by the time one has already done. Toward the end, time becomes a sweet promise."

Mumia Abu-Jamal

From Prince, Purple Rain, New Year's Eve (2000):

"Time ... Time is a trick ... How many birthdays did you have? ... One ... You had one day of birth ... You continue to count birthdays ... Your mind gives up ... Your body deteriorates ... This is the trick of time ... Man was never supposed to die ... We were given everlasting life ... By The Creator ... The Father of Jesus Christ ... There is no other King ... There is no other King ... Only Jesus Christ ... Time is a trick ... 1999, huh, I don't think so ... We could be in the third millennium perhaps ... It might be 1492 ... Who knows? ... I only want to see ya in the Purple Rain ... if you want to sing with me, it's alright ..."

Prince in the Purple Rain, Super Bowl XLI (2007)